When you’re in a woman’s chat room, it’s guaranteed that sooner or later you’ll both start talking about what you like to do in your spare time. Feeling out your compatibility is all about finding similarities between each other and seeing how well you could work out with your differences. Even if it’s just your first time with her, she subconsciously wants you to be able to sympathize with her, because that’s how she checks if you’ll make sure that she’ll have fun in your private chat as well.
So when you’re talking about each others’ interests, the worst you can do is put down something she enjoys. Even if you think it’s a ridiculous hobby, admitting to that will sound to her like you’re saying that she’s just a free method of sexual relief – a thought she won’t like and will lead to her leaving. Avoid the following three reactions to prevent this scenario:
Some people have hobbies and interests that sound absolutely boring to anyone who doesn’t share them. There’s nothing wrong with considering something uninteresting for yourself, but expressing that, especially in presence of a person who thinks otherwise is plain insulting. If you say that a woman’s interest is boring to her face, she’ll come to the conclusion that you think she’s boring as well and the date will be over before it really started.
Also, be careful about indirectly implying that there’s nothing great about her interest. Questions like “So that’s what you do most of the time?” may not expressively say so, but make implications she won’t like hearing either.
Directly or indirectly saying that something has no use is just as insulting and will lead to your partner coming to not so beneficial conclusions about your character. A lot of interests don’t have an obvious use other than simple entertainment and passing time pleasantly. Watching TV and movies, playing video games or starting a collection of something aren’t clearly useful interests, yet they are incredibly common and it’s safe to say that you yourself indulge in at least one of them. Calling something she does useless would make you a hypocrite, not to mention that she’ll consider you to be a bitter person who doesn’t find joy in things – and that pertains to sex and relationships as well. No one likes being with someone like that.
My Interest Is Better Than Yours
It’s not unusual to have some sort of unofficial contest running between you and some other guys. That’s just a way of pushing yourself to give your best. It becomes a problem when you’re so used to trying to one-up someone else that you start doing it with your dates. Doing so when you’re talking about each other’s interests combines the two previous points and multiplies their bad results. To any woman you’re talking to, you’ll look like you’re bragging and she’ll question if you’re all bark and no bite, in sex and relationships as well.
Avoid making these three mistakes and just show some curiosity about what she feels passionate about. Even if you can’t share her enthusiasm, you’ll at least signal that you respect her and everything that is a part of her life.